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Four Questions to Ask Yourself Before Starting a Fresno or San Diego Divorce


If you are considering filing for divorce, you may find yourself facing uncertainty, fear, anxiety, and a whirlwind of other emotions.

Sometimes you know when it’s unequivocally time to end a marriage; other times, it’s not so cut and dry.

Of course, divorce is a big decision that can have significant financial implications on your life, as well as on your spouse’s and children’s lives. Only you can decide if you are truly ready to take that leap.

Seeking legal advice

Consulting a compassionate family and divorce lawyer may help you understand and evaluate your options when you are unsure whether to end your marriage—so it’s a good first step to take.

If you do choose to proceed, your attorney can guide you through the proper actions to take and offer you invaluable support along the way.

But in the end, the decision is still up to you.

After you visit with a trustworthy attorney, ask yourself the following questions:

      1. Do I still have feelings for my spouse? Your feelings toward your spouse may be complicated. Of course, you probably feel something for them, but is the love you once felt outweighed by other negative or painful emotions?
      2. Would I be happier without my spouse? Try to imagine what your life would be like without being in your marriage. Does the idea bring you feelings of relief or even excitement? Do you think, ultimately, you would be better off if you ended the marriage?
      3. Am I prepared for the financial stress that divorce can bring? Financial stress or instability is no reason to remain in a truly toxic marriage, but it’s important to grasp the potential financial strain you may experience from ending your marriage—especially so that you can consider paths to divorce that might minimize that burden.
      4. Have I done everything I can to try and save my marriage? Whether or not you have exhausted every tool available for saving a marriage, have you taken reasonable measures to repair the issues or damage in your relationship? Some damage is truly irreparable and sometimes you simply may not be interested in saving your marriage, but this is a question only you can answer.

If you are able to answer these questions with relative certainty, you probably know whether it’s time to file for divorce.

If you cannot answer these questions yet, that probably tells you that you’re not ready to decide.

Sometimes, it may even help to consult your spouse with these questions.

Maybe they are experiencing similar feelings, and answering the questions together could help you both realize that your marriage is worth saving—or that you’re prolonging the inevitable by remaining in a relationship where you’re both unhappy.

Rely on a knowledgeable attorney for help with your California divorce

If and when you decide to file for divorce, the experienced professionals of the Law Offices of Rebecca Medina in Fresno & San Diego are here to support and guide you.

Call us at 559-324-5427 in Fresno or 858-285-4315 in San Diego, or contact us online today to schedule a consultation.

Rebecca MedinaAbout the Author: Rebecca Medina

Rebecca Medina is an experienced Family Law attorney, mediator and Collaborative Divorce Lawyer serving the Fresno and San Diego areas. She handles cases ranging from complex divorce matters to child custody, spousal support, prenuptial/postnuptial agreements, QDROs and uncontested divorce cases. She was rated “Clients’ Choice” by Avvo.

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