When most people think of divorce, they imagine fighting, bickering, acrimony, and more. When couples divorce through traditional litigation, they often lose respect for each other as each works to be the “winner” asking the court to decide every issue.
It doesn’t have to be that way. Couples can divorce with respect and move on to their new lives without regret.
What Does it Mean to Divorce with Respect?
Divorce is a crisis time for most people. They have feelings of anger, shame, frustration, and even grief over the loss of the dream of happily ever after. The secret to divorcing your spouse with respect is not to act on those emotions. Act in accordance with your higher values.
Realize that your family unit is transitioning, and you need to do it in a way that is healthy for everyone. Try to remember to honor the relationship you once had.
If you have children, the best gift you can give your children is to divorce in an amicable way. Do not talk negatively about the other parent. It increases the stress level of the children if the parents are constantly arguing with each other in front of them.
If you can look ahead to where you want to be five years from now. You have ended the relationship in a way you can feel good about. That means you divorce in a way that respects yourself and your spouse.
How a Collaborative Divorce Helps You Divorce with Respect
In a Collaborative Divorce, the spouses and their attorneys agree to come to your own settlement agreement and not go to court. As you transition from spouses to co-parents, you can learn how to enhance your communication skills.
The Collaborative Divorce process is designed to reduce conflict. Divorce coaches, financial experts, child psychologists, and other professionals are brought into the process so that you both can be fully informed and make rational decisions that are not decisions based on an emotional response. You form agreements on the issues that work for everyone, and then you can move on with dignity and respect.
Couples that divorce in this way feel better about the process. They are able to move forward faster and divorce in a way that is much healthier for their children.
Rebecca Medina is an experienced family law attorney with offices in San Diego and Fresno. She is a mediator who also takes a collaborative approach to family law. She will assist you with your quest to handle your divorce respectfully. Contact our office today at 559-324-5427 (Fresno) or (760) 239-0845 (Encinitas / San Diego).
