Mediation is a common process for reaching a divorce settlement. But, you don’t have to wait until problems reach that point to take advantage of the mediation process. You may benefit from mediation to settle disputes that could save your marriage.
Negotiate a postnuptial agreements
A postnuptial agreement is similar to a prenuptial contract, but the agreement is executed after you are married. You may have a number of reasons for deciding to enter into an agreement with your spouse. For example, if you passed up employment opportunities to support your spouse’s career, you may want assurances that you will be financially secure should the marriage dissolve.
Just as many couples engage in mediation to negotiate the terms of a prenuptial, you can use this same method for reaching an agreement after you are married. This sense of financial security can alter the dynamics of a relationship, which might ultimately save the marriage.
Engage in transformative mediation
Every couple has a unique relationship and responds differently to counseling techniques. Transformative mediation offers an effective form of counseling that may work for you. The process does not focus on resolving a single goal, but rather guides you and your partner through discussions about topics that affect your marriage. With the assistance of a trained mediator, you can avoid the pitfalls of having a private discussion with your spouse. Scenarios in which transformative mediation might be effective include:
- One spouse interrupts the other who is trying to make an important point.
- One partner regularly dismisses the other’s viewpoints or fails to listen effectively.
- Issues that at one time seemed petty begin to chip away at the relationship.
- An individual feels too overwhelmed with anger, frustration, or hurt to talk calmly.
Transformative mediation provides a neutral space for addressing common marital issues. The parties may not reach a formal agreement at the end of the session, but have had an opportunity to speak, listen, and discuss.
Be open to changing your mind
Divorce mediation is designed to help partners separate cordially and equitably. However, sometimes the process helps each partner see the other’s point of view more clearly. You might understand the situation better and still believe the marriage is irretrievably broken, in which case the mediation was successful in reducing the stress and anxiety associated with divorce. If instead you begin to doubt your decision, and your spouse agrees, be aware that you are not on an inevitable course to divorce. Your divorce is not final until the judge signs the judgment.
Consult with a Fresno and San Diego mediation lawyer to learn more about using this technique to save your marriage
Mediation is not just useful in divorce proceedings; you can take advantage of this effective process to help your marriage. Contact Fresno and San Diego mediation attorney Rebecca Medina to learn more.
